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Things are about to change in a big way

I’m changing things up a bit here on my bulimia recovery blog.  I’ve enjoyed reading the blogs of many great bloggers for years and started to wonder what direction I wanted to go in with my blog to make it a great blog.  I believe to take it to the next level I need to grow myself into the person I want to be.  Sort of my life philosophy applied to my blog, right?!

I tend to be a pretty private person. I have a small circle of friends, I Facebook but I wouldn’t say I put my whole life online for the world to see.  Well, that’s about to change.  I’ve come to realize that my mission in life:

I teach people through example and empower them to overcome obstacles and become their greatness through self-love.

is not going to come alive and BE my life if I don’t start demonstrating for people who I am and how I live.  If Ghandi had been the beautiful being he was, but hid out then India and the rest of the world would be a much different place to live in.  I am an uplifter and see the good around me most of the time.  I think the world needs more people like me sharing what we see to keep the light shining.

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As a recovered bulimic hiding out comes pretty natural to me.  Heck, I spent 20 years hiding my eating disorder from everyone who knew me. As an only child I’m also comfortable going it solo and not wanting to share with others.

I’m changing today.

Actually, my personal transformation started a few weeks ago and now I’m willing to put myself and my daily life out in the open for people to read about.  I am part of a mastermind group of women who I adore dearly and they’ve helped me come to realize I avoid collaboration and partnership.  Long story and parts of it will probably come up in future posts, but for now let’s just say that I really, really like to do things on my own.  Sadly, one of my mottos has been: If it’s meant to be, it’s up to me.  That serves me well sometimes and keeps me isolated and playing small in major ways.

So what does all this talk of transformation mean?  My short-term goal is to blog every day for the next 30 days.  I live a full life and know that will be sometimes demanding, but I’m up for it because I know transformation comes when we put ourselves outside of our comfort zone.  I’m also a discipline freak (strong suit) so when I set a structure I act within that structure.

Am I afraid to be writing this where you can read it and hold me accountable for the person I say I want to be? Oh hell yeah!  But I know you also love me even though you don’t know me because we as humans intuitively love each other.  Especially when we see one another taking a risk to grow ourselves.

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I’ve decided I’ve been overly concerned with other people’s opinions and have been letting that keep me playing small.  As the quote above from Bill Cosby says, I cannot succeed if I’m living to please others.  I’m committed to being my authentic self from here forward.

Here’s what I want you to know:

  • I’m going to share what’s going on in my life each day.  To hopefully share uplifting ideas, inspiration and lessons learned that you can bring into your life.  I don’t think about eating disorders all day long. I enjoy a well-rounded life so the things I’ll share with you are going to include the things that I enjoy like entrepreneurship, animals, hiking and everything else that pops up!
  • I’m not going to hide out any more.  If I want to light up the world I can’t do it from a closet.  I want to touch, move and inspire people to be their greatness.  If I do that for you, please leave me your feedback because all this writing can get pretty lonely if there isn’t someone to tell me they’re hearing me and how they feel about what I share.
  • I love my life and look forward to sharing it.  Life can be so sweet and while I have good and bad days I have way more good days than bad.  I’ve always been able to see greatness in people and the world and I want to spread it.  There are huge media organizations spreading the few bad things that are going on each day – my work is to be and spread the light.  Will you do that with me?
  • I’m trusting my inner guidance.  I don’t totally know where this is going or what I’m doing yet.  I’ve learned over the years that when I do what feels good, things work out.  I know that I’m a part of Source and well being is the order of the day so I’m just going with this feeling I have that this will work out well.

I’ve been writing my blog up to this point about what I thought people most wanted to know – tips and ideas about overcoming bulimia.  Which I’m sure is true, but we learn from each other in so many ways.  And we don’t usually learn from words in a textbook or on a blog.  We learn by watching others live and learn or from our own growth having tried something and come to understand life in a new way.

Life is like a classroom and we’re all studying different subjects and at different levels of evolution.

I have come to realize that the bloggers I love the most are those that I feel connected to because I feel I know them.   They’re like a friend I like to spend time with. I don’t think I’ve done a great job of letting you in to get to know me.  Get ready, ’cause you’re about to get to know me in a whole new way!

I truly believe this is going to be a fun and joyous experience.  Writing in this way feels so natural and open I can’t tell you the relief I feel for letting the walls down and letting you into my life.  I hope your experience of who I am inspires you to new heights and we get to know each other.  I may be teacher here sometimes, but I am always a student and want to also learn from you.  So, please feel free to contact me privately or share your feedback anytime in the comments below.

You’re up to great things in life, so please share what you would like here and other people will grow because of you.

I leave you with a beautiful poem from Marianne Williamson:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Much love to you,

Polly