Feeling frustrated [with yourself] and want to create a lasting change in your life? Here's…
I believe help for bulimia begins and ends with you. Yes, you can get a lot of support from friends, family, therapists, support groups and the like. But in the end it’s who you are with yourself that makes the difference.
I was preparing to go for a hike this morning with a friend I respect a ton who’s a very successful online business woman, has three great kids and a wonderful relationship with her husband. When you look at her from the outside you wonder if she ever has bad days. Or at least I do! I enjoy studying and learning from other people’s lives and what a great person to learn from. Someone who is demonstrating on the outside the results of inner joy, connection and fulfillment.
I look around in my life all the time for ideas to write about to provide you help for bulimia. What dawned on me as I was driving to meet her for our hike was “what does she say to herself to stay up?” and “what’s her mindset like“. I was curious to hear what her inner conversations were when she had breakdowns. Well, it turns out the day before she was struggling and frustrated by some things in her business and said as soon as one ball fell all the others followed suit. Sounded like a perfect opportunity to learn from her how she handles life’s challenges.[polly_newsletter_form]
Questions to Ask Yourself
Where our mindset is will be the point of inspiration for the thoughts we think and especially our inner conversation. She laughed and told me at first when the balls were crashing around her yesterday she first asked things like “why is this happening to me?“, “what’s wrong here?” and “whose fault is this?” She quickly caught herself having Negative Nelly conversations and started to look for the lesson or opportunity. She didn’t even let her ego answer these negative questions and instead starting focusing on positive questions.
Here are a few of the questions she gave me that she uses to look for the lesson in any situation and to uplift herself out of a breakdown:
What’s good about this?
Even if the good will come in the future and maybe not now
What can I learn here?
Breakdowns are great opportunities for personal growth. See what can you learn now that will serve you in the future.
How can I or others benefit from this situation?
See if there’s an underlying silver lining. The flip side of darkness is light.
What may I have done that lead to this that I can do differently in the future?
Taking responsibility and uncovering your role in the situation is not only empowering it can go a long way to help you create different outcomes in you future.
If you believe my philosophy that everything happens for a reason and that reason is there to serve me the response you have to a breakdown in your life can be different next time. Don’t get me wrong. You may have an instantaneous reaction to a bad situation, but it’s your recovery from that reaction that will either serve or defeat you. I hope you’ll choose empowering thoughts and start asking uplifting questions like those above that can serve you in eating disorder recovery.
If you have any helpful questions you’d like to add that serve you when you have a breakdown, please share them on my bulimia blog below. I appreciate your comments!