Are you being run by that crazy voice in your head? You know the one.…
Tell a New Story
It’s time to tell a new story.
I realize now that if you want recovery from anorexia or bulimia you can’t keep telling a story of addiction, shame and not-good-enough.
That ah-ha moment hit me yesterday as I hiked for three hours listening to a video from one of my favorite self-help teachers, Abraham Hicks.
The title of the video was “Tell Your True Story” (embedded below). At first I related it to the women who have sent in their recovery stories to me over the years and the power sharing your story can have (the healing you have when you release and share yourself and the power someone else can feel by reading and hearing their own story in your words).
That’s all well and good and I want to continue to encourage people to share their recovery success stories here so I can pass them along. But, what Abraham talked about in this video struck me so much that I had to sit down right in the middle of the path. I didn’t have my laptop, but I just knew inspiration would come (as it always does when I listen to Abraham) so I had my journal with me. I wrote down some quick notes about what I heard and the insights that came to me.
I’ll share in just a minute what I wrote about and want you to get from these teachings, too.
But before I do I want to set the stage to remind us both of the importance of the thoughts we think and the beliefs we hold. It’s too much to go into at this moment, but just know that our beliefs are thoughts we keep thinking. Over and over and over and over. You think a thought long enough you eventually start to believe yourself. (Note: it works in both positive and negative ways.)
What I’ve noticed in my life [and as I type this I’m smiling because I’m subtly using this article to remind myself to use this(!)] is that what you think about comes about. What I think about and hold as my belief is what comes about in my outer world… reality. I’ve seen the power of my intention most aptly when I wanted to recover from bulimia in 2005 and I remember just saying to myself over and over again in my mind “I am a non-bulimic“.
I also used it in my relationship. In the early days with my now-husband, I used to say to myself over and over “I want a loving, healthy, supportive relationship with a wonderful man.” If we’d get into a fight or just disagree about something, I’d say it like 25 times. Helped calm me down and remember what I DID want.
It turns out that our subconscious mind, which I believe is most closely connected to our Source/higher self, listens to what we say to ourselves. Abraham calls it giving orders to your Manager. When you think a thought and give it emotion (heightened emotions, positive or negative ones, that have more charge give more energy and help you manifest more quickly) like deep passion or joy it has attraction power.
A thought is taken by our subconscious, and by the law of attraction, more thoughts are attracted to it. You think more thoughts, your get your energy going, you become a magnet for what you’re thinking and feeling.
When you think a thought like “I’m bad” or “I’m so stupid” the universe is just as ready and willing to give you opportunities to make that your reality as if you said “I’m loving” or “I’m worthy“.
I’m chuckling as I think about this…
One of the adjustments I had to make when I was early in my recovery was to release my focus on “I’m courageous“. I thought that was a great thought to think because it felt better (or at least sounded better) than “I’m afraid“.
The problem with holding a thought of “I’m courageous” all the time was the Universe was delivering me opportunities left and right to be courageous. It took me awhile to get why I found myself being asked to overcome huge fears like bungee jumping and walking on fire month after month.
I was attracting fearful experiences to me so I could be courageous. Pretty obvious now that I look back, but at least I caught on before it got really going.
Are you following me with this law of attraction thing?
The thoughts I was thinking, turned into beliefs and the very responsive subconscious self, my Source/Universe, were delivering to me what I had going on in my vibration.
I want you to understand that this is good news. I see it that way now anyway because I see where my own power lies…and yours does, too.
I call it EMOTIONALIZING what you want. You think and feel in your body what you want and it has to come about. It is a Universal law in an attraction based universe like the one we live in.
Tell a New Story
So what does this all have to do with telling a new story you ask?
In the past few weeks I’ve received a lot of really sweet stories from my email subscribers. I’m so grateful if you’re reading this and you’ve shared about yourself with me. I hope it makes you feel connected – it does for me. So thank you for your courage to contact me.
I’m not going to break any anonymity here, but I do want to use some quotes from letters I’ve received to help make a point. I hope you’ll see the importance of why I’m doing this in a minute.
Here are some actual comments from messages I’ve received to give you an idea of the stories we’re telling ourselves today:
The holidays are hard, especially when they are centered around food!
I’m struggling with depression. Feeling kinda hopeless and empty, lack of motivation, loneliness, insomnia.
I am feeling so lost with all of this bulimia and food. I am feeling shame and guilt around all of it. I don’t know how to take care of myself. I feel undeserving.
I’m seriously maxed out and every day my eating issues get worse and worse.
I’ve battled this illness for almost four decades and I’m so tired. Tired of everything. Tired of hating myself and my body. Tired of the shame. Tired of repeating the same behaviors day in and day out.
Sounds pretty awful, huh?
While I can admit this is our present reality, our future doesn’t have to look like our past. Not if we don’t let it. Our state of being tomorrow, next week, or next year can shift and shift big time.
If you can come to believe, like I do, that you’re responsible for your life then the way to get out of these stories [beliefs] starts when you start to tell a new story.
Make Recovery Your New Story
I will be sharing more on this in a future post, but when I did a series of success story interviews for my eating disorder website GetBusyThriving.com, I remember distinctly one of the women of recovery saying something along the lines of:
When I was in a treatment center I told myself I was recovered and it felt like a lie at first. I said it over and over again and it stopped feeling like a lie and because my life. It wasn’t immediate. It wasn’t hard either.
That’s the power of our thoughts.
We can tell a new story.
A beautiful recovery story that looks like whatever we want it to look.
How do we do it?
We do it one letter to our self at a time. One thought at a time. One focused meditation at a time. In our moments of strong desire we passionately ask for and affirm the new story! As often and passionately as you can start to tell yourself a new story, the more comfortable you’ll soon be with that story. And what’s even better, the Universe will rearrange itself to make that true for you.
This is all reminding me of an analogy I learned years ago from a woman I met along my bulimia recovery journey in a workshop. She used to say, “I’m turning my ocean liner. It may not turn on a dime, but slowly and intentionally I’m turning the course of my ocean liner.” What it meant to me was that the direction of our life, the course of our ocean liner, can be changed. It doesn’t turn on a dime, but we can change the course of our ocean liner and we can change the course of our life.
“Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” Napoleon Hill
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back— Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth that ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.” The telling of a new story, the letting go of non-supportive beliefs in favor of new affirmations, is the changing of the course of our ocean liner. If you’ll allow yourself the flexibility and patience it takes to see a new course for yourself, you can change your direction. You can get yourself in a new place…and soon…if you’ll stop saying, believing and focusing on that thing you do that gets you all wadded up and resistant to your true nature. – Goethe
Your true nature is well being. It is. I believe that.
Reading my belief just then may have caused your monkey mind to scream out “WTF, my life isn’t all well being!!“
It’s ok if that just happened to you.
Just don’t allow yourself to hold onto that belief (my life isn’t well being). Recognize that’s where you are and be gentle with yourself. Begin to say to yourself things like “I may not be where I want to be yet, but I’m sure things will get better. Maybe not this red hot minute, but I can choose to focus on things that make me feel good and when I do that more of the time I do feel better. This too shall pass.“
Saying things like this to yourself will release resistance to well being. It will attract more thoughts like it. It will raise your vibration. It will activate your subconscious to generate more of that for you in the future.
That’s why the better it gets, the better it gets.
If you’re willing to let go of the old story that probably went something like “the worse it gets the worse it gets” in favor of a new story – even for a little while – by releasing your resistance to well being you will invite more well being into your life. You’ll start to let your cork float and you’ll being to achieve your natural state of wellness, of well being.
Here are some of the words you might start to allow to creep into your thoughts, your heart, and remember to give it energy (speeds up the manifesting!):
I am so grateful for my health and vitality.
I believe in myself. I can do anything I set my mind to.
My life is getting better and better (little by little).
I do have what it takes to be well.
Today will be an awesome day.
It’s my life and I’m grateful for every moment of it.
I love and support myself and feel the love others have for me.
I trust the timing of the Universe (God/Spirit/Source).
I take it slowly and allow well being to flow to me.
Life is fun and I am thriving.
I appreciate each moment.
I love my life.
I’ve personally been practicing that last one for 3-4 years now. Some days it feels amazing to say that and others it can feel like a lie.
I’m turning my ocean liner. One thought, one day, one inch at a time. And if I can have days that make me really feel the excitement of “I love my life” more often than not, then life really is and can continue to be the amazing experience it’s supposed to be.
Can You Do Me a Favor?
Because of the nature of this blog I don’t hear from everyone who stops by (i.e. shame/guilt).
That’s ok, but it sometimes makes me wonder if I’m doing any good out in the blogosphere.
I trust in my heart that all of my visitors get something – even just one thing – from my words.
If you got something from this would you do me a favor?
Would you tell me your new story. There is a comment field at the bottom where you can submit a comment. Would you take a few minutes and speak from your heart once you’ve imagined your new story?
Consider answering this question: Imagine it’s 5 years from now. You’ve overcome any resistance to well being (i.e. your eating disorder) and you’re living an abundant life. One that may sound like a dream to you now. What is your life like? Who are you?
Your True Story
I started out this article telling you about the Abraham Hicks video that wow’d me yesterday.
I’d like to leave you with that video and highly, highly recommend you listen to it at least 3 times.
I listened to it about 5-6 yesterday and today and I am so gosh darn glad I’m posting it here so I’ll be able to find it forever more.
Abraham encourages you to “hear the story the Source within your tells.”
Your Source says: All is well for you.
Yes, it is.